surviving church as a single

the website stuff christian's like is pretty funny. a few weeks ago there was an article about single adults and church (article can be found here) i related to a few points but really the article caused me to come to a major realization (or to rehash the same realization i talked about here). basically being single in church can be tough. i assumed it would be easier if there was a single's group that i could be a part of. i'm not gonna lie, in my head this group is pretty cool and we do lots of fun things. plus everyone's single so no one feels like the awkward third wheel (but more on that feeling later). but what if, one day there is a single's group and it's totally lame...or what if there is no one in that group that i can relate too? or what if it's one of the dreaded combo groups...i mean i'm only 23 and i don't relate well to college students at all..i can't imagine how true this will be in a few years.
and evidently, well according to the article at least, there are some big stereotypes that would be associated with such a group. and seriously if someone said something to me like "i don't know how someone as great as you isn't married" and it had been a bad sunday, there is a definite chance that i'd burst into tears at that exact moment...which would be awesome. oh and "if you stop looking for love you'll find it" okay barf...seriously people...i immediately thought of all the times people have told me they met their spouse at a youth or college retreat so that could totally happen to me too. yup i've been to Winterfest too many times to count (over 10 years) and still no ring or boy...so just because you went ONE year and happened to meet the "one" please don't act like the same thing will happen to me. plus whatever happened to encouraging a girl to happy with herself as she is. let's not put all these expectations on youth retreats and i bet everyone will leave them so much more fulfilled with God rather than negative thoughts about how it was a failure because you didn't get the guys number. (okay off that soapbox)
and if anyone ever told me how i needed to be more like the proverbs 31 woman i would cry...or punch them...but probably cry. i just wonder if people seriously think that's okay to tell someone. and let's just be clear here...i'm going to make an awesome wife and mother one day and yes all women could try and be more like the proverbs 31 woman but don't act like that's the reason i'm still single okay? (okay really moving on)
but seriously the main thing i gathered from this article (other than thankfulness that i haven't experienced a lot of these things yet and fear for what might come) is that maybe being a part of a singles ministry isn't all i've imagined in my head. but i'd like the opportunity to try it out. i'm written before about how much i loved my church experience in high school but i haven't really talked about my church-going experience while in college. that's definitely too much to write about here (be looking for a blog post all about that) but looking back on it now, it was a let-down. i don't know if i just had unrealistic expectations or what...but i think that has been one of my biggest regrets so far. and now that i'm past that phase, i think i would really like to try out a single's ministry. but how? i mean if the church your attending doesn't have one and you really like your current church, do you seek out other churches in the area looking specifically for such a ministry? [i feel like this could just be a slippery slope to selecting a church based purely on whether or not a potential husband is also attending...] or do you stick with where you are happy? or maybe you just look for jobs in completely different states knowing that maybe a clean start would be cool too. 
surviving church as a single can really be tough and evidently it's that way whether or not your part of a  singles ministry. but there has to be some redeeming qualities to a singles ministry right? again, i know i'm thinking of how church was when i was in high school but it was great to have friends who you could always do stuff with. whether it was getting dinner on a thursday night or lunch on saturday or just wondering around target aimlessly, it was so nice to have that companionship. and when your the only single person, you don't have anyone to do that with. so you end up eating dinner out alone or your the third/fifth/ninth wheel. either way totally awesome (again i think i have a whole blog post coming on this subject alone..i know your so excited)
so maybe this post was just another ramble that makes absolutely no sense...but maybe you get it too. and hey if your in the greenville area of sc maybe we should just start our own singles group. i promise i'm not as sad/dramatic/crazy as my posts may lead you to believe!